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I always felt like "that was the stupidest decision you ever made", "what the hell is wrong with you", "dude its too late" and when I realized that, there is no room for me to fix the situation. It always happened to me, and I don't like it when it’s happen. Trust me no one like those thing... People I'm talking about appreciation.

I just received one bad news from one of my bestfriend, Wancha's father died, and rest in peace in Kelantan. She's one of my classmates. Semoga roh arwah bapanya dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan dalam golongan orang- orang yang beriman, Al- fatihah...

I always eager to have a perfect family, without been realized that I should be thankful that I still have both mother and father, although they were not perfect, but still, they love me, eventhough they not showing their love to me. I guess I'm very lucky to have them, compared to my friend who just lost or already lost their father and mother. I completely understand how the feel to be lost, because I also had an experienced lost someone that I love. Way back then, I always thinking, "I should treat them better" or "why I can't be nice to them"... I guess this is the fact that people always regret after something not very nice happened to us and people sometimes not think twice in making a decision.

Again, I'm talking about the appreciation here. I never show appreciation to my parent, and I think I'm the most ungrateful son. I always disobey their order. Many of my friend can get whatever they wants, just asked their parent and they will get it.

Me: Mak, adik nak beg tue boleh tak?
Mak: Beg yang lama kan ada lagi? boleh pakai lagi kan?
Me: Tapi mak, adik tengok kawan adik beli beg baru mak.... cantik...
Mak: Sabar la dik, nanti mak ada duit mak belikan utk kamu..
Me: Ala... Mak ni...
Mak: Mak mintak maaf dik, Mak tak mampu nak belikan kamu beg baru...

Those memories flashed back in my mind, I still remember after I said "Ala... Mak ni..." I can see tears in her eyes. Korang tau tak, kalau kita buat mak kita menangis, walaupun hanya la setitik air mata, dosanya sama dengan sebesar lautan didunia ni? I can imagine how sinful I am; because I still remember I make her cried so many times.

My dad, I don't know how many time I broke his heart into pieces. I always quarrel with him, and I always cause him into troubles. Well I believe, as a human being, we will never satisfy with what we have. Always want more than what we can effort, and I guess this is the fact.I don't know why I write all these, and I don't even know whether it is right or wrong telling all of these in this blog. Actually there is lot more story that I want to share, but I can't stop my tears from falling down. Thats make me stop sharing my story.

P/S: Mak, Abah adik sayang sangat kat mak n abah.

P/S 2: sekali lagi aku ucapkan takziah untuk keluarga wancha diatas pemergian bapa beliau ke Rahmatullah. Semoga roh nye dicucuri rahmat dan ditempatkan dalam golongan orunk2 yang beriman. Al-fatihah....